Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
