I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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