In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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