there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
