that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
fuck your aforementioned shoe
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Randomize