ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Someone came in the potted fern
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
