i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
worst night to have a conscience
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
