Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
