no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
