i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You left your underwear on the fireplace
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
