just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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