I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
operation harelip BJ is a go
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
