super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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