trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Randomize
