go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize