Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
