nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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