dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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