it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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