The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
