Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize