great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
