No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
