my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
