They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize