Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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