Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.

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(305): View more from Florida

I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.

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(301): View more from Maryland

I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.

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(719): View more from Colorado

On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.

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(662): View more from Mississippi

We should reintroduce naked Mondays

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(850): View more from Florida

Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.

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(513): View more from Ohio

conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.

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