I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize