Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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