My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
