why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
