I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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