I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
