OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize