oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
