yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize