friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Randomize
