she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I wish i was in the wii world.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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