And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
too bad you live with your parents still
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
We named our party play list daddy issues
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
you made out with another girl for some wings
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
