It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
