? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
