But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize