im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
