3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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