Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
