you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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