can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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