I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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