Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
