i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
