No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
