I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Your cock deserves a montage
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I just sucked dick on a ferry
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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