We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
