I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize